Unlikely Places

I am the one that always responds “no amount of money.”  You know the game where people say “for a million dollars would you spit off the rail at the mall and humiliate people?”  “For $10,000 would you eat a squirrel?”  My husband laughs at me, but I am just not motivated in those ways.  Not that I am free and clear from the lures of materialism or from pleasing people, etc.  I am more likely to eat a live cricket to make someone feel better about their life, and that has its own set of demons.

Enter the hilarity of me being in qualifications to earn a Lexus with RF.  The sheer irony of this is not wasted on me.  I am quite content with my Toyota Sienna Minivan. (The automatic doors change lives, people!!!)  On the inside, my car mainly looks like a cross between goodwill drop off and a Chickfila dumpster (the cleanest of fast food dumpsters).  So, there have been conversations about who will actually drive said car with strict rules on cleaning it!

This journey (and it has been hard work, effort, collaboration, getting out of my comfort zone) has brought me to a place that I did not seek, per se.  I have worked hard to encourage and equip myself and others to grow personally and professionally.  I have engaged in business with the heart to help others with the greatest lion’s share to equip and provide for our boys.  God has placed specific people on my team to help us thrive.  I am so proud of them and thankful that we are persevering together.   I am unbelievably thankful for the financial provision that God has brought through this business vehicle–that is the reason I stepped into this.  But, I am not going to lie….the titles and the car and the carrots are a distraction.

We can so easily be looking to the next goal or thing to fill us, and, deep down, we KNOW they do not.  Yet, we are crushed when they don’t.  However, we find ourselves in a race believing a lie.  Man’s praise feels good for the moment, but it is fickle.  Cars and titles rust.  Trips vanish from our minds.  If there is one theme that the Lord has been singing over me, around me, to me for the last 15 years–THIS WORLD IS NOT OUR HOME.  The things of this world can be enjoyed in Him with an eye for His worth and glory, but when they are seen as the “IT,” they will destroy us.  When we put an expectation on this life to fill us– our family, our spouse, our career, our children’s behavior and performance, our vacations, our bank account, our church, our friends– we will be crushed every time.  Or, we will be satisfied for a moment only to chase the next thing (whether this be a new relationship, jobs, cars, boats, vacations).

My prayer in this whole process is for my heart and the hearts of the people working with me.  Don’t get me wrong, I am thankful for this season, but I am continually reminding myself and being reminded to live this life with an open hand.  Material blessing is a test of our hearts, and we are all susceptible to begin to be enthralled with and value that which is dung.  We can easily start to trust what we can control with our bank account versus knowing that we ultimately do not have control.

So, by the end of the Summer, I could be driving a new car.  However, know when you see me that I do not glory in it but I glory in the Father.  May this business be the opportunity for me to engage with and to serve others whose need goes much deeper than anything financial.  My deepest prayer is to help others come alive, and I fight with all my might to keep my heart and mind and actions focused on that goal alone.

Published by jenpinkner

45 years old Married Mom to 2 From Tennessee

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