Posted in Anxiety, authenticity, discernment, facebook, healing, Uncategorized

Living without Facebook

In the last five to six years, my life has changed with technology.  At this pace, it will continue to.  As much as I don’t want myself, my child or family to be engrossed in technology, this will be our battle in this present age.  People have begun to “live” in a virtual world.  The ways we “connect” with people have been changed as we learn about one another through tweets and status updates and instagrams.  We may not be able to recognize someone’s voice but we know intimate details about them.

I have been in John 10 in the last few days…”My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me…no one will snatch them out of my hand.”  The intimacy of getting to know Jesus’, the Father’s and the Holy Spirit’s voice…wow.  Sometimes I feel as if I know facts about Jesus just as I do a virtual friend.  Information without intimacy and transformation.  He becomes a task and a to do just as the hundreds of status updates.  This happens when I have too much on my plate and too much noise in my mind.  I am not able to stop and hear and see Him in opportunities that arise.  Opportunities become annoyances that are in the way of “my” tasks.  Those God appointed moments that He has planned for me to walk in good works and become a refined workmanship of Him, I can make a mockery of.  (I miss the very reason He has me here because I believe I know better what to do.)

The last year I have talked about my plate a lot–learning how to balance.  SInce being on Facebook for the last five years or so, it has become a way that people have reached out to me ministry-wise, in friendship and has replaced email in many ways.  With the young adult population I work with, it was a “necessity.”  However, as of the last six months, it has become another thing that has stretched me thin–wide and not deep in relationship with others.  I felt pulled to return intense messages of needs of others while not interacting deeply and faithfully with those the Lord had given to me in person.  I felt pressured and harried.  I checked it first thing in the morning and multiple times a day…and for what?  I really don’t know.  Maybe I was afraid I would miss something earth-shattering like a picture of someone’s kid or an engagement or a pithy comment about a tv show:).

These last months without Facebook have been awesome.  At first, it was hard–my mind was trained around status updates.  Then, I began to think a part from that.  My mind has been retrained.  No one needs to “know” what I think about my day or the latest tragedy or latest pop culture reference.  It is not wrong to have a facebook, and I will probably have one again.  However, it has been so refreshing to let my mind and heart rest from the pull.

I miss the people of facebook–people who I do not regularly have contact with, people who have lost husbands and children and mothers and dreams.  I do miss knowing how I can pray and minister.  I do not miss the noise in my heart that comes from the added facts that are oft times pointless–other people sharing their noise.  I do not know what the future holds with me and facebook, but I do not have a committed relationship to her right now and I am thankful for this break.